Christmas—not always a joyful time of year

Christmas is about colored lights, decorated trees, and gift giving, but it’s also a time for deep reflection and sadness, for some.

While most people are celebrating Christmas with their families, others might be alone and feeling miserable. It’s especially hard if you just lost a loved one to be reminded of that loss.

I’m fortunate to still have my family, but our holiday get-togethers now have changed. We used to have huge Christmas Eve gatherings and exchange tons of presents. It was exciting and a little overwhelming. Now, we have quieter get-togethers with less presents. We’re all older now and pretty much have everything we need anyway, and it gets harder to decide what to buy people, even ones you know well. That was a stressor for me every year at Christmas.

The unfortunate part of our Christmas gatherings in recent years is that they aren’t always happy occasions. Yelling at each other is a new addition. Those sweet, innocent times are long gone now with the rise of lies and fake posts spreading on social media and cable news, the latter of which really isn’t news. Those so-called news channels are meant to anger people. And the trolls on social media are intentionally trying to cause rage. It’s sad, but a part of our lives now.

The good news is my husband and I have our own intimate Christmas celebration and traditions that help me through this time of the year. I think, no matter what, you need to find your happy place.

Hopefully, we as a nation can get past all of this anger, and I hope my family can too.

Merry Christmas, Happy Yule, and Happy Winter Solstice to everyone.

A New Perspective on Life

There’s nothing like a series of health scares to open your eyes. That’s what happened to me in July and into August. My experience was horrible, painful, and distressing. I’m not 100% yet, but I’m doing better. My journey into Hell started with what appears to have been caused by stress and a stomach virus that led to blood sugar fluctuations and a tweaked neck. Fun times. I simply wasn’t listening to my body trying to tell me to chill out and not do activities that strain my neck. Lesson learned.

I’ve been addressing my stress by starting Tai Chi, and it’s helping. I should have been doing this a long time ago. Yoga breathing exercises are also helping me stay calm.

All of this has put my writing and my whole life on hold. I had finished the first draft of my vampire thriller right before this happened. Streams of thoughts and ideas about changes have come to me in spurts, and I have been making notes to review later when I can spend more time on the computer. This has turned out to be a good break from my story. I can return to it with fresh eyes and ideas on how to expand areas.

I also started reading books again, something I used to do all the time until I guess I lost focus. Reading other stories helps with my writing process, and it is a nice escape from life stresses.

Even though my experience was one of the worst for me, it also helped me open my eyes and start living better.

 

Older Main Characters in Fiction

I’m noticing more older main characters in fiction, even though I know there have always been mature main characters. I wasn’t paying attention to that until I got older. Now I can relate to them. Things like needing reading glasses and dealing with aches and pains are part of my life now. I recall a funny moment from the violent Sons of Anarchy show where the evil, controlling mother was trying to hotwire and steal a car. She had to get her readers out so she could see.

Since I’m still recovering from my health scare, I haven’t returned to the book I was working on yet, but I have been editing for other authors. A small-press publisher hired me for three jobs, and keeping busy is helping me get back on track. So far, two of the books have older main characters.

It is refreshing to see stories featuring older main characters in books and on TV. Sometimes, though, watching these elderly people struggling with daily life is hard to take in. One recent example is the documentary on Ozzy Osbourne’s last couple of years and his final weeks. It was a great accounting of how much he went through after breaking his neck in a fall and then his final weeks planning his farewell concert. The documentary was both humorous and heartbreaking. One line stood out. “I used to take pills for fun. Now I take them to stay alive.”

I’m at that age now where watching an older person struggle is difficult to handle, but it’s part of life.

I’d prefer to see these mature characters running around like a 63-year-old Tom Cruise in his latest Mission Impossible movie. It’s inspiring to see that, but everyone ages differently, and everyone has a different story to tell. Even the daily struggles are inspiring in their own tragic way.

Escape to a world of enchantment and passion.

www.kelleyheckart.com