Monday Musings: Death amongst the beauty

On the morning I was driving home after watching my dog get euthanized, I couldn’t help noticing all the beauty in the world even though my dog had just died. Inside, my world was bleak and empty of any joy. Outside, the sun was shining and life was evident in the smiling people going about their day.

I thought maybe all that life and beauty was meant to taunt me. And then I realized that I wasn’t the only one that had just lost something precious to me. Every day people and other living things die, which means there are grieving people around at all times affected by death. And yet there is still beauty in the world even when death is present. The sun still shines, painting the sky in layers of light and dark shades of amber rose, the birds still sing as if unaware that death is present—a silent, grim shadow hidden amongst all the beauty…waiting.

While I was driving, this one thought rose to the surface: Maybe all the beauty is meant to help us move on, to be inspired to keep living.

 

 

 

Kelley Heckart, Historical fantasy romance author

Captivating...Sensual...Otherworldly

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Monday Musings: Losing a pet is never easy

On July 15, 2014 we lost our older male dog. This isn’t the first dog we’ve lost and won’t be the last, but it’s never easy to lose a pet. I don’t understand how these creatures worm their way into our hearts. I mean, they are only animals, right? They aren’t human. And I think that is the answer—they are not human. They give us what a human cannot—unconditional love and constant companionship. So we love them differently and we mourn them differently. I always worry that I didn’t do the right thing for them. They can’t tell me what hurts them or what they want, so I have to guess. This time I think I guessed it right. This gives me some comfort, but losing a pet that is a constant in your life is heartbreaking, no matter how you lose them.
Hercules wasn’t like any other dog. He was a chi-weenie, so he was part dachshund—a hound. Hound dogs lead with their nose and prefer to be out sniffing things. Herc didn’t care if he pleased his masters. He did his own thing. So when he was always at my side, I knew he was there because he wanted to be there. We tried a training technique on him once. The idea behind this technique was that dogs don’t like to be shunned by the pack, so they won’t repeat whatever they did to get them shunned. This technique worked great on our other, people-pleasing, dog, but not on Herc. When it came time for him to be let outside and shunned for 15 minutes, he didn’t care. He just went about exploring the yard with his hound nose. And that made me love him more.
In the end he lived up to his sturdy name, fighting for his life as long as he could, and then I told him it was okay to stop fighting. Farewell, my sweet boy, I sure hope we meet again.
RIP Hercules
1998-2014


A few of his many nicknames throughout the years: Monkey Butt, Stinky Man, Peanut, Mouse, Mr. Grumpy Jeans, The Badger, Old Man.

One of the first pics I took of him as a puppy.

He always thought he was a bigger dog.

Hunting in the grass in CA.

1998 or 99 in CA. Happier times.

Can you believe he was red-flagged at the vet? LOL

This is one of my favorite pics of him playing with his sister. Devil Dog!

Even as an old man he still had some fire.

His favorite place was on my bed right next to me.

Patrolling his yard.

Hanging out with Loki.

Kelley Heckart, Historical fantasy romance author

Captivating...Sensual...Otherworldly

http://www.kelleyheckart.com

http://kelleysrealm.blogspot.com/
http://twitter.com/CelticChick
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Memories of Xena

We lost our female dog on 5/5/12 to Lymphoma. After her diagnosis, Xena went downhill very fast, but like her namesake, Xena: Warrior Princess, she was a fighter to the end.
I usually don’t post about anything other than writing related stuff and my collection of hunky longhaired men, but this seemed appropriate since she was an inspiration to me in many ways. We shared the same medical condition, colitis, but while I complained and felt sorry for myself, she never showed any signs of illness, always happy, enjoying the sun on her face and eager for belly rubs. She also inspired my writing. A white wolf in one of my books is based on her.

Xena had a special bond with my husband. She shared my husband’s love of peanut butter and music. She was an accomplished singer. When Mike would strum his guitar, she would sit in front of him and sing along to the melody. She also had an awesome wolf howl.

She loved her stuffed animals and would gather them around her.
At Christmas, she would proudly show off her latest stuffed animal.

At an outside New Year’s Eve party at my parents’ house, she sampled any plates or drinks that the guests unknowingly placed on the ground by their chairs. She was so stealthy, no one noticed her but me.

When she played with her brother, she would make him do all the work. While he ran around and got tired, she would remain in one spot and lunge at him as he ran by.

I will always remember her playing with White Boy the Chihuahua, chasing him around the coffee table at a high speed at my parents’ house.

She loved belly rubs the most, well maybe after peanut butter.

When she hurt her leg and was walking on three legs for a while, she chased a rabbit on only three legs. Her nickname until her leg healed was Hippity Hop.

Sock wars. Xena and her brother would play in Mike’s pile of freshly washed white socks on the bed.

My husband would leave the bathroom door cracked open a little in the morning and she would burst in on him, eager for the treats he would give her later.

While sitting in his recliner eating something with peanut butter, Mike would see an eye staring at him from the corner of the footrest. It was Xena, hoping for a lick of peanut butter.

Xena was strong to the very end and we will never forget her. RIP, beautiful girl.

1998-2012

Kelley Heckart, Historical fantasy romance author
Captivating...Sensual...Otherworldly
http://www.kelleyheckart.com
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